Kansas – Your State SUCKS!
Yeah, you heard me, Kansas. Your State Sucks Ballz. But don’t worry. You aren’t the only state that sucks. And to show you that you’re not alone, every month I will showcase another great American travesty. Because I want you to be informed!
Kansas has not elected a Democrat to the U.S. Senate since the 1932 election.
Your State Sucks…
…because of your politics. You’re a Red state. That automatically makes you duke. All of your leaders are Republican and that is ridiculous. I’m not saying they should all be Democrat (although that would definitely be my preference) but have you guys heard of expanding your minds? Oh, that’s right – you like to stay mush-brained. Ya’ll voted for Bush. That’s a conversation stopper if ever there was one.
Over the past four decades, Kansas has remained more socially conservative than many parts of the nation.
Your State Sucks…
…because of your religion. I don’t have beef with faith in a higher power. I don’t mind that you have a strict moral code which (supposedly) means you will act more kindly toward your fellow humans. I couldn’t care less about how often you go to church — how you wanna waste your time is your business. What I take umbrage to is that you brainwash your children into believing there is no other way to live. Hello — doesn’t your god want you to freely choose him, each of your own accord? What the hell good is your faith if it doesn’t come from an actual decision made in a moment of clarity after carefully weighing the options? What you provide instead is NOT free will — what you do provide is a parroting of what yo mama told you to say and then pretending you thought of it yourself. Douche move, Kansas Conservatives.
Twice since 1999 the Board of Education has approved changes in the state science curriculum standards that encouraged the teaching of intelligent design.
Your State Sucks…
…because of your school board. I mean, seriously? You guys want to teach philosophy and morals and sociology in a science class? And then you want to rewrite humankind’s history in the process? Why not go back to throwing stones at each other and picking knits from your neighbor’s scalp? I can’t seem to get over the fact that there is an entire state filled with such ignorance and goofy-headed, backwoods nonsense. Clearly ya’ll need someone to move in from outside and take the reigns, since you have truly screwed the pooch. As is your prerogative, I suppose. But don’t act like a dumb-dumb and then get all offended when I call you on it. Dumb-dumbs.
In Kansas, gay marriage is explicitly forbidden by the state’s constitution and by statutes. In fact, the state will not recognize same sex relationships in any way.”
Your State Sucks…
…because you don’t treat people equally. I don’t even have to say much on this one. You said it yourself, Kansas. Ya’ll care more about people’s penis-n-vagina activity then any of the activity-doing-individuals. Which makes you icky and mean. Also? Assholes.
The Republican-controlled Kansas House of Representatives passed a 69-page anti-abortion bill. The passage sets the stage for Kansas to potentially enact one of the most restrictive abortion laws in the United States.
Your State Sucks…
…because you are so far removed from women’s rights that it’s a shock they are allowed to vote within your borders. No surprise, given that Kansas is both conservative and Republican (the two being almost entirely mutually exclusive at this point). Gotta love an institution that cares more for a couple of biological cells than for the actual human being housing them. Somehow, it is believed, a child born to a mother who didn’t actually WANT that baby is supposed to be a good decision. I’m thinking that’s a pretty shitty thing to lay on both infant and mother. Kansas, your men are bossy and bad. Why don’t you Kansas women uproar? Yes, I remember now. You’ve been subjugated and live some kind of 1950s, pre-vote nightmare. *shudders*
I could really go on-n-on about why Your State Sucks, Kansas, but I’m going to stop here because my brain can’t take the unhappy you just spewed. Also, you make my vag kind of uncomfortable. I don’t like knowing that it’s on your mind. Stalker, much?
