Breastfeeding Boobs — Blogging from A to Z Challenge April 2012

I have never seen this happen, the women near me always cover up with a blanket or something. i dont know where you guys live but by me its pretty normal

I see nothing wrong with breastfeeding in public. My issue is when I notice a breastfeeding woman and she glares at me like I'm interrupting a private moment. If it's in a a public place it's not a private moment, and she should expect curious looks.  Not ogling or offensive leers, mind you, but those looks that people give when they notice something a little out of the ordinary.

Out of curiosity, how are we supposed to change attitudes about nursing and breasts, if we do not enact the change that we want to see? If absolutely everyone hides out breastfeeding until the cultural tides change, how on earth would the tides change? You may be pro-breastfeeding, and you may have breastfed -- but I would not call this a pro-breastfeeding stance.

As a breastfeeding mom, I am personally uncomfortable with other women whipping out their boobs in public. I went to a kids birthday party (filled with 6-7 year old kids) and one of the moms pulled her shirt down and breastfed while all the kids stared. Breastfeeding is great but not everyone needs to see your nipples.

I agree. I'm no prude, but I get rattled if I see nursing in public. Since I'm in the upswing of my bi-mood and I need absolutely everything clarified for me RIGHT NOW, does our little Meggie like your post, or is she a haterz? I sense the latter, not the former. If I'm being nosy, tell me to MYOB.

I'm with you there, Andi-Roo. I have a roommate, well two actually. one of each kind. The girl kind, breast fed both hers, who are now in their 30s. She not only whipped it out in public, she let them breast feed until they were seven or so. I fail to understand the benefits of this, but have wisely kept my yap shut, discretion being the better part of valor, just this one time. She is a peach in all other ways. More of your loverly writing. Thanks, Andi-Roo. You do soooo much for me, girl! <3

Utter fail of an article. All this does is explore, to great extent, the lack of maturity in our society. I've had TEENAGERS at shopping malls witness my breastfeeding with more decorum than you showed here. It didn't seem to bother them, nor did they giggle and whisper about the "cha-cha" I was using to feed my infant.

Absolutely agree, DC. Further, I am bothered by the righteous indignation when I attempt to shy my child away, as though *I'm* the one doing something outlandish. I'm fairly certain that it's up to *ME* as a parent to decide when the time is right to broach the topics of nudity, attire, health, sex, & all the other issues surrounding the naked boob.

Your first question is a fair one, Ashley. I don't know how we can get to a point where nudity isn't an issue, but I suspect that many young mothers aren't interested in changing social norms. The current generation is extremely exhibitionist, as well as engulfed in a feeling of entitlement (see my post on this subject here: https://theworld4realz.com/kids-why-you-no-dress-like-kids/ ).  As for my stance, I am pro-breastfeeding. It's the method upon which we disagree, not the act itself.

If we continue to sexualize the act, attitudes won't change.

That's my point exactly, Jessica. Glad you agree! Discretion is always the better course.

OMG --- Mary, I almost forgot to hand out the prize!  Per my Post #69 ( https://theworld4realz.com/open-letter-invitation-to-haterz/  ), I will need Meg to supply her mailing address so I may send off her Purple Heart! Thank you --- what would I do without you???

"She is a peach in all other ways."  <<- Excellent reminder that all of us have redeeming qualities. Thank you, Mary, for bringing me down of my horse! :)

"First, I think breastfeeding is awesome, healthy, fabulous, and definitely the way to go if you are both able AND willing.""Second, I nursed both my babies.""Truly I’d prefer if we could all lighten up and be comfortable with the topic of sex and nudity. But I didn’t make the rules, and society didn’t ask my opinion when they collectively decided that while mans can show off their chests, woe-mans must put theirs away." I think using discretion is far more mature than an displaying utter disregard for those around you. 

Well, we can agree here. There's nothing wrong with me feeding my child in public. There's nothing wrong with you leaving the area if it bothers you.

It's not even necessarily sexualizing that I'm worried about. What bothers me is that those who display their breasts in public are deciding for me that it's time to talk to my small child about boobs. And that is where your right to expose yourself impedes my right to making parenting decisions.

That's true, but sexualizing is in the eye of the beholder. Breastfeeding in public is not the same thing as sexualizing the act of breastfeeding.

Discretion? Do you think it counts as discretion to say you're okay with the health benefits of breastmilk before going on a rant about the way it's delivered? I'm glad you're not 100% against breastfeeding, but let's be clear: you're not a supporter. If women can't breastfeed in public, they can't BE in public easily until their children are weaned. A baby can get hungry any time. Many babies (mine included) CANNOT feed with a cover. For many reasons. Have you ever tried to drink under a blanket? Have you ever sat in a public bathroom and enjoyed a meal? Would you do both of those things regularly so random bystanders wouldn't get offended? I don't think so.  This is what your article boils down to:"I'm actually okay with using boobies to feed your kids. That's healthy. But c'mon, the'yre BOOBIES. Sex objects! Ta-tas! Hide that shit so I don't have to see your mams unless I explicitly ask...or happen to be passing a Victoria's Secret store where I'll see the same amount of boobage blown up bigger than life. Which is okay...I guess...because at least there's a skimpy bra hugging it."

This post sexualizes the act of breastfeeding. Calling breasts "ta-tas" and suggesting that feeding an infant is an obscene act gives the stigma to breastfeeding. If a child asks what a person is doing (as my step-daughter did when I breastfed my infant), it's not that hard to say "That's how some babies eat." It's a fact of life. Saying "Oh, boobs. You'll learn about those some day. *nervous laughter*" unnecessarily complicates and suggests obscenity where there is none.

"sexualizing is in the eye of the beholder" Exactly --- similarly, a woman can decide that having words printed on the back of her ass isn't sexualizing, yet you can't convince the person whose eyes are accidentally drawn to those words that he is choosing incorrectly. "Sir, even though I want you to READ words on my ass, I want you to NOT view is it as sexualizing." "Men & little children, even though I am displaying my breast, which is currently in this country considered sexual & socially taboo, I want you to decide to NOT view it that way. Because it's just too hard to cover up."

Yes. We do. And those sacrifices need not include an entire year indoors or feeding in unsanitary/disgusting places. I suppose I'm lucky it's illegal to harass a breastfeeding mother here. (Though really, I was never harassed. Most people didn't even NOTICE, since my son's head and my shirt covered just about everything.)

"If women can't breastfeed in public, they can't BE in public easily until their children are weaned." And that's what it boils down to. You want to have your cake & eat it too. Parenting isn't easy. We make sacrifices for our children because we put them ahead of our own wants & needs.