Bacon Jokes — WTF?

 

I don’t understand the surge in Bacon Jokes. Or weird, bacon-flavored foods. Or references to it that don’t make sense in normal conversation.

 

Please. Help me to understand the phenomenon of these Jokes.

It seems everywhere I turn there are more and more jokes about bacon. Everyone makes Bacon Jokes on Twitter:

 

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Oh no! Bacon Is Disappearing Fast — Could You Live Without It? thestir.cafemom.com/food_party/143… @

— The Stir

 

@ You freeze to mitigate impending shortage. seriouseats.com/2009/06/how-to…

— Marc Zazeela

 

 

Here’s an online bacon magazine:

Bacon Magazine

 

There’s even bacon in ice cream now. You can find a recipe for it in this book:

 

To me, that’s just no joke. There is nothing even remotely entertaining about fucking up my dessert in such grotesque fashion.

 

“You might be an asshole if…”

 

… if you put bacon in my ice cream, motherfucker.

 

I feel like I’m missing the funny. So I’m asking my readers…

 

WTF gives with all the damn Bacon Jokes?

 

Okay, this joke is a little funny:

 

Don’t get me wrong. I enjoy a bite of fried pork now-n-again. But maybe not quite as much as other Bacon Joke enthusiasts. And one time I got salmonella poisoning — while I was preggers, no less! There was a fuck-ton of barfing and pooping going on during that period — so my taste for it may have waned somewhat since then.

 

But we’re not just talking about enjoying the taste of bacon here. We’re talking about full-on obsession, like such:

 

That book? Yeah, it’s also available on Kindle. In case you wanted to get your bacon-love taken care of without carrying around an actual BOOK-book.

 

Wikipedia has a page on so-called “Bacon Mania”. INSANE.

 

I told my 18-year-old son that I was writing a post on Bacon Jokes, with an eye toward discovering just what the flying fuck this nonsense is all about.

 

“PLEASE let me know what you find out,” my son implored, “because I’d really like to know, too!”

 

My son, I’m sorry to report that I have no frigging clue what these Jokes are all about. It would seem that America is just cray-cray. Which surprises me not at all.

 

Weirdos.